While acknowledging the unsurprising success of the no morning snack on Alba’s ability to actually eat her lunch without World War III, I questioned whether this strategy was going to have any impact on the manner in which she ate said lunch – and ultimately help with her patience.
However, I may well have been wrong in questioning this – could waiting for her meals help to enhance overall patience? Perhaps accustoming her to waiting longer for her food could help to develop this sense of calm that we see in French children?
Food (or snacks should I say) has frequently been linked to patience in various child psychology tests – most famously the “marshmallow test”, created by psychologist Walter Mischel.
OK I’m ready for this 
if I close my eyes maybe this will all be over
I didn’t think there was a chance in hell that Alba would pass this deferred gratification test, but full disclosure – she did! Well, a poor version (deferring 1 Smartie for 3 later, and after having had about 6. And I didn’t leave the room.)
Exactly as a recent BBC documentary about child development said, she used the power of distraction to keep her away from the lone Smartie, hopping off the sofa to play with some toys nearby and then taking herself out into the garden. So as much as I can moan about her tantrums, I was very impressed with that!
I’ll have to try it again properly (leaving the room and not with a tum full of chocolate) and see what happens, but I’m desperate to develop the delayed gratification skill in her. Druckerman also looks at this in her book.
I’m particularly interested in the link that Mischel found between those (very small number) of children that passed the test (sacrificing the one marshmallow now for the sake of two later) and their (positive) behaviour later on in life – better at concentrating, more intelligent, self-reliant and confident, and trusted their own judgement.
Given my ability (or lack thereof) to deal with stress, and horrific decision-making skills, this is a priority for me to work on in Alba – early signs suggest she’ll be exactly the same as me!
However…more recent research has disproved this link, and goes further to suggest that it could be a waste of time trying to teach delayed gratification (at least for long-term objectives).
Despite these new findings, I still think there are immediate and relatively broad benefits of teaching waiting skills (even to just enjoy a peaceful meal out) – although the trick is that I need to apply this concept of “attend!” to more than just snacks – TV NOW, nails painted NOW, questions (so many questions) that she needs the answers to NOW..
Interestingly, while having no grasp of “maintenant” she certainly understands “attend”. Leaving our local supermarket the other day, after being told she needs to “attend!” when demanding a babybel, she shouted so loudly half the car park heard her “I WILL NOT ATTEND!” Oh the eyebrows.
She also turned to Eadie yesterday at tea, while she was shouting for more food as usual, and very sternly told her baby sister to ATTEND!
So she at least knows what it means..??
By way of Provence 